Behind Somatic Waves
Every wave begins with an undercurrent.
Somatic Waves began with mine. The hidden currents of burnout, loss, and the deep ache for reconnection. This page is about the path that carried me to this point in my life, and why I am devoted to holding this work for others..
My Journey:
From Disconnection to Deep Transformation.
There was a time in my life when I felt completely disconnected, from myself, my purpose, and the world around me. On paper, I had done it "right." I had worked my way up in different careers, achieved financial stability, and followed the path that many would consider a success, and I was lucky to have it. And yet, beneath the surface, I had lost myself.
Looking back, I can now see how every step, the challenges, the heartbreaks, and the awakenings, were actually guiding me back to myself. Each moment was preparing me for the next step toward my purpose. But at the time, all I knew was that something was very off,
and it had to change.
Creativity, Intuition
& the Early Years
I was raised in a home where creativity and imagination were cherished. Growing up in a small town in Finland, I was encouraged to spend time in nature, connect with the land, and express myself through art. I was a quiet child, often turning inward, reflecting, and trying to make sense of big emotions I didn’t yet have the words for.
Creativity became a way to process and express myself without any words. Art, movement, and time in nature became places where I felt most like myself.
So creativity became my ticket out into the world, my escape, and it led me to study contemporary art and photography. I was free to express my inner world, explored ways to capture emotion, atmosphere, and the subtleties of human experience.
After years of studying, I thought my path was set. I had planned to continue my photography studies in London. But a spontaneous trip to Dublin one spring, changed my trajectory. Something about Ireland called to my soul, and soon, I had scrapped my plans and followed my intuition to begin a new chapter there.
Losing Myself in the Hustle
After a few carefree years, frolicking as an au pair in Dublin, I - like many others - fell into the rhythm of “making a living.”
First came retail, where I worked my way up from a shy sales assistant to confidently managing stores and teams. I loved living in this world as it still gave me a sense of freedom, but eventually I grew restless and cracks of toxic environments started to show. I knew it was time to move on.
Then came the corporate world, a path younger me would never have imagined, I started in an entry level position but soon found myself promoting up to managing global client accounts, chasing the high of career growth, and stability.
Retail had pushed me to step out of my comfort zone, teaching me resilience and leadership. Corporate life offered me security and financial gain, all wrapped up in the illusion of “work-life balance.” But it came at a cost I hadn’t anticipated.
At first, I was just grateful for the stability, and excited about all the life perks that came with this career move. But as time went on, chronic stress and anxiety became my trusted companions. I even found myself casually searching online for “heart attack symptoms”. I was experiencing intense emotional lows and anxiety, but throughout my life I had learned how to mask, learned what feelings were were socially acceptable, and my brain pressed on the auto pilot function, high-functioning burnout became my norm. It had quietly evolved over these years, just as my career success, perhaps thats why I didn't fully acknowledge it. I convinced myself this was just life. And I was “successful,” wasn’t I?
But it was different this time, I had lost a connection to myself along the way, and so lost my natural ability to regulate. I was silently drowning in heavy waters of exhaustion and disconnection. It became impossible to ignore but I didn't know how to change. During this time me and my partner also experienced a traumatic car accident while travelling abroad, it required a lot of recovery, both physical and emotional, perhaps it was the universe forcing me to finally pause. But I didn't, I hardly took any time off fat all. Instead I carried on, with a lingering concussion and nausea accompanying me, I gave my energy to work, to client meetings, to KPIs, to projects, to chasing revenue. I didn't listen to my body this time either.
So, being part of a sudden company wide redundancy became an unexpected life line, it forced me to finally pause in a way I hadn’t allowed myself to before. Not to be dramatic, but it probably saved my life.
Returning to the Body
What followed was a slow, sometimes frustrating, sometimes frustrating, and deeply humbling process of rebuilding my relationship with myself. I started with simple things, like allowing myself to just slow down.
I found myself craving nature, I desperately felt the need to be grounded, quite literally, I wanted to be absorbed by the earth, by the greenery of spring sprouting around me.
Looking back I know my system was asking for regulation.
For the first time in a long time, I began to notice the connection between my internal state and my physical experience. I could see how stress, anxiety, and emotional suppression had lived in my body, and taken over my thoughts. Alongside this awareness also came grief. I could see how far I had drifted from myself, and I yearned to re-connect with her again.
To get there, I had to rebuild trust with myself, and learn how to stay safe in my body. Which brought me on a journey of being curious. Curious about the body and its own intelligence, understanding patterns and how emotions are stored, expressed, and released.
So I set out to learn about the body’s own intelligence, becoming curious about how emotions and patterns lived within me, how to be present and listen to the subtle sign-language of my body, as I could now understand that lasting change couldn’t come from the mind alone. This was a lesson I learned when I found myself looping back into old patterns of self-destruction. But at least I was now aware of them.
This led me toward practices that would become foundational in my life. Somatic awareness, movement, Breathwork, and energy-based work. They became ways to reconnect and remember. And as my body began to feel safer, I was relieved to realise the noise in my head had stopped.
Meeting Myself
And piece by piece, I also began to remember and connect more deeply with earlier parts of myself, including younger experiences that had shaped how I experience and moved through the world, when I allowed my intuition to guide me.
This became an important part of the process, and for the first time in years, I gave myself permission to awaken dormant parts of me again, to trust where they might lead, even if I didn’t yet know the path. It also meant that the person I had become over the last decade or so, was about to be unraveled.
I am forever grateful that I have such a supportive partner, I know these times were very confusing for her, and she struggled to understand the journey I was on and choices I was making. I found it hard to verbalise what was going on within me in a way that would have made sense to her. As truthfully, I sometimes I struggled to understand it myself. I also never expressed how deep in a dark place I had fallen before the redundancy, and how much that time actually affected me, I tried once or twice at the time, but it never came out in words, just tears that were comforted.
The inability to sufficiently communicate emotions, to be vulnerable and allow people in, is something that has followed me from childhood, and often times burned bridges. Connecting with myself again came with so many layers, often extreme shifts from one side to another before the weighing scales finally started balance out again, and I don't blame my partner for not understanding, for being worried and concerned, angry and possibly resentful at times, as I regretfully did shut her out more than I realised during this time. But it wasn't because I didn't trust her, I just didn't yet trust myself or understand it all. I just had to follow this invisible thread that I felt inside.
Where the Paths Lead You
On this journey I have come to realise, over and over again, that healing doesn’t happen in a straight line. It truly does unfold in layers, sometimes it happens subconsciously where our body releases in tears and we don't know why, and sometimes the process can be both physically and emotionally painful. Each step, each practice, each teacher arrives at exactly the right time, bringing new awareness and another piece of the puzzle.
If only we allow it to happen.
I explored the unseen layers of our energetic bodies, through Reiki, Angelic and Shamanic Healing modalities. Something I have been drawn to, and fascinated by, since a very young age. Memories started emerging, from when I had been gifted a crystal healing set as a teenager and had my mind blown from what I experienced, and the tingling sensations I could feel in my hands then, and now, was like homecoming of a dear friend.
I also came to experience energetic work in a completely new, and unexpected way, through Kundalini Yoga. I have practices many different lineages when it comes to yoga, but this for me was different. The flowing kryas' took me by surprise, they were beautifully, and powerfully, incorporating chanting mantras and breathwork that allowed my body to release in a new way. In classes I found myself sitting in a meditative state, doing breath of fire, with tears flowing down my face and no idea why. Each session seemed to provide me with exactly what I needed that day, sometimes I resisted and struggled hard, and other times I was in flow. All sessions were different, but they left the same sensations, my energy was moving, within me, through me and around me, and I quickly became addicted and curious.
I was fascinated by the energetic connection to emotions, and how emotions are intimately linked with our bodies, our organs and our physical health. This was not a new concept for me by any means, but kundalini yoga had open up my eyes in a new way. It brought me into deeper studies about the nervous system, patterns, shadows and trauma responses, reading books, following podcasts, until finally I found myself taking a course on trauma informed awareness in coaching. I could easily spend my life content with reading and studying these topics.
The Science of Breath
But part of this journey was also about getting to know myself, trusting in my own intuition, following where was I being pulled. For a while I was contemplating taking a Kundalini Yoga Teacher training, but I realised that while I had a love for this beautiful yoga, it was Breathwork that pulled me in a different direction. To be honest, a couple of years ago it was actually my partner who once brought up that I should do Breathwork, I was talking about how I would love to one day host a Summer Solstice retreat for women, and she said I should include doing Breathwork or Yoga. At the time it seemed so unreachable and so far away, how could I ever reach a point where this was my reality.
But, here I was, Breathwork had finally found me. The Green Tara College in Dublin dropped in my lap one day. They were offering a facilitator course that, for me, ticked all the boxes. It turned out our teacher- Kamel - though coming from a scientific background, was an initiated Shaman from the Quechuan tradition in Peru, he brought his traditions and wisdom, alongside his training within Soma and Pranayama Breathwork, into a welcoming and powerful blend of deep Conscious Connected Breath and ceremony. Though I have deep reverence for Kamel's lineage, and I am truly blessed to have been invited into the shamanic traditions of his teachings, I do not bring any shamanic elements to my own client sessions, only the beautiful core of his Breathwork journey which is profound in itself.
Breathwork became a teacher that opened me up to the depths of emotions and states our bodies can travel to. Much like Kundalini had taught me, it was about tuning in and allowing ourselves to feel into our bodies, being present, observing and allowing. To get out of our minds and anchor into ourselves without judgement. How working with our physical bodies, and being grounded, help us to safely work through through layers of emotional blocks. And I learned that this is the actual key to unlocking our mind and consciousness to new levels.
A Deeper Understanding
As I was completing my BW practitioner training, I was also already immersed in a new corporate job role. Who could've guessed.
But I had been blessed with the time I needed to reset, to regulate my nervous system, and find myself again. This time, corporate life was different. I felt in control of my body and emotions, how I experienced and reacted to a new environment and stress that comes with the job. During this new time in the corporate world, apart from completing and practicing Breathwork, I was still on a learning journey of wanting to understand how our experiences and emotions imprint on the body, how it shapes our patterns and even our health.
This continued exploration brought me to SpinalFlow, which felt like another missing piece in this puzzle. It was energy work but not from an external source like Reiki, but it focuses on working directly with the body’s own natural life force that flows through us. I attended an Immersive training retreat where we were all our own practitioners and clients, an intense week of experiencing receiving SF and practice it on each other. I was truly in awe of of how amazing our bodies own intelligence is if given the right conditions. I love how SF allows us to connect directly with the body, how our fingertips are like little magnets, drawn to the exact touch points that will connect with the nervous system and gently start moving energy which is deeply protected through our spine.
This Immersion was truly a mind altering experience for my own journey of healing trauma, and finding an even deeper connection to myself. It was here where I also finally met my wounded Inner Child, and allowed myself to feel her pain and finally release it. And it was during this Immersion, where I also experienced Kundalini Energy in a completely new and unexpected way. What I wittnessed and experienced during this week deserves a story of its own, and perhaps soon it will be shared.
From the outside in, this might all seem very “woo woo,” but in truth, it is very much a practice of deeply connecting to your body, of understanding and truly knowing yourself. It’s about being honest with yourself, not searching outside of yourself for answers. This is what being truly spiritual is, it is about finding your way back to your own core, to your body, not shying away from the hard stuff, not being afraid to witness your own shadows, but meeting yourself with compassion and a willingness to go deep. To stay grounded in your human experience, to feel it all, and to find solace and uplift on the other side. It can be messy, difficult, far from perfect, but also so beautiful and so human.
Finding what works for you
It might seem like I have jumped from one modality to another, finding the next thing that will "heal" me. But all of this didn't happen overnight, not even a few weeks or a few month. The journey I am describing came through over a few years. I was not chasing the next "spiritual high", the next practitioner who would "fix me". (Although, I am very familiar with this pattern and it is also part of the journey )
They all came into my life unexpectedly, but at the perfect time. I entered every practice, every modality, every experience, with thought and care, with awareness and embodiment. My intention was always to allow myself to release what was meant to be shed, and receive the healing I needed. There is no "one modality fits all", because just as every modality is different, so are we as people, we change and evolve, every emotional wound, painful experience, and trauma, are stored in our bodies and they will all release in different ways, with different techniques, and only when the time is right.
Each step, and each layer matters, one by one they bring you closer to remembering who you already are within, and the most important transformations happens in-between sessions. Yes, there might have been a big breakthrough, or a powerful release during a Somatic Energy work session, and that is amazing. But after that? what are you supposed to do then.. Often these big moments start to fade like a dream as we go back to our regular routines and slip into the same patterns again. However, when our bodies, and minds, are given the space to integrate, to consciously reflect and feel what we have experienced, it allows change to start occurring within us. This space, the in-between, is almost more important than the healing session itself, this is also why it plays such an important role in my own work as a Somatic Practitioner. From my own experience, and thanks to amazing mentors, I know that we sometimes need someone else to hold space for us, and support us, during the in-between stage.
Where I Am Today
Today, I hold space for others to embark on their own healing journeys, just as I once did for myself. Through Gentle Touch, Guided Breath Journeys, Energetic Alignment and Trauma-Informed care, I support the Nervous System in finding safety, the body in releasing held patterns, and the spirit in reconnecting with its true light.
This journey is about coming home to yourself. It’s about learning how to observe your shadows and release them with compassion. Remembering who you are beneath the layers of stress, conditioning, and disconnection. To explore the in-between spaces where true transformation takes root.
If you feel the call to begin, know this:
You already hold everything you need within you.
I’m simply here to hold space as you remember.
Like carefully balanced stones on the shore, each truth holds its place.
Grounding me, guiding me, and rising together in harmony.
Not sure where to Begin?
Why not check out Why Somatic Healing, My core Building Blocks and Why Work With Me.
